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Monday 27 August 2012

CSI:Miami 10.6 "By The Book" Review

Calleigh (Emily Procter) and Delko (Adam Rodriguez) are called out on a stormy night, how cliched, to a mansion where they find the DB of a woman suspended upside down from a chandelier.  She's devoid of all blood and Delko notices the two bitemarks on her neck.  Calleigh: "I hate Hallowe'en."  Due to the absence of blood, Calleigh thinks she had to have been killed elsewhere, since it's easy to drain a body of human blood only when the heart isn't beating.  The human body contains 8 pints of blood (which was rattled off a few times and twice by Calleigh alone.)

Horatio (David Caruso) says they need to find the killer before he "kills again."  ME Tom (Christian Clemenson) notices a tingly sensation in his hands after removing the ferry pass from her pocket.  Walter (Omar Miller) says only guests who are on an exclusive list are invited.   Ryan (Jonathan Togo) takes his phone and IDs her as Andrea (Aria Pullman).  ME Tom isn't wearing any gloves, shouldn't he have been wearing some before touching the DB.  Ryan notices a dead mice smell and ME Tom says that's the smell of hemlock.  They've been trained to detect such smells.  Ryan forgets to thank ME Tom as usual when he finds her ferry pass.  ME Tom can always be relied upon to provide the laughs in an episode whenever it's usually needed.

Walter and Ryan find the plant outside in the garden and claim they need to speak with the gardener.  Lo and behold, said gardener appears with some logs.  Kenny (Michael Ray Escamilla) says he was chopping wood since they have to keep the mansion in working order cos they never know when Marilyn or other guests might arrive.  He leaves since they have no probable cause to hold him.  ME Tom becomes obsessive about washing his hands.

Delko and Calleigh find a letter at the mansion which is written in an unknown language.  Hey anyone can tell that letter was written in blood.  Slow on the uptake these two, how long have they been CSIs?  A search on the Internet reveals the writing was the creation of vampire author Marilyn Milner (Diane Farr).  (Suspiciously akin to Anne Rice or the Twilight saga if you're into that.)  The letter was signed by "your eternal disciple" and states he will drink the blood of  a virgin in her honour.  Going out on a limb here, were Tripp (Rex Linn) and Horatio assuming Andrea was a virgin, ha.  In the flash, when they show the letter being written, no gloves are worn so strange they don't find any prints on the letter.

Calleigh takes it to Natalia (Eva La Rue) for analysis since she can't take it to QD.  A DNA result matches to Wes (Chad Todhunter).  Cue Calleigh conveniently running after him (ugh - gasp- in flat shoes - yeah cos she really has those on in the mansion and psychically knew she'd be involved in a chase!).  Wes tackles her to the ground and bites her wrist, before Horatio pulls a gun on him.  He makes a run for it and climbs the tree.  Horatio shoots the branch and Wes threatens to sue.  Horatio tells him to "be my guest."

He found Andrea dead already and was going to drink her blood, but she didn't have any.  Marilyn took a flight but is missing.  Delko asks ME Tom to find the puncture wound on the DB and he thinks he should wash his hands again.  Delko then notices some trace in her hair.  Travers (Christopher Redman) identifies this as from a de-corked bottle.  He's also an expert in wines.

The chef Lawrence Kingman (Orlando Jones) is brought in for questioning and he's the anonymous 911 caller.  He checked her for a pulse when he found her and left the trace behind.  He also has a wine stain on his sleeve.  He was my suspect, cos he had access to the wine but how can a chef be so sloppy with his whites.  He'd be fired for that!  The editor, Joseph Crumbaugh (Jonathon Schaech) told him to leave.  He says he wasn't there but Horatio notices the photo of his boat.  He was with Andrea but left and was having an affair with her.

Walter and Natalia check out his boat, #1 Best Cellar (hey a clue, re wine.)  Here they find Kenny and Kingman.  They're ghostwriters and wrote the books for Marilyn, having just finished their third.  Natalia finds Andrea's laptop with an e-mail to Joseph blackmailing him, otherwise she'd reveal all.  He was going to pay her off but found her DB and left with the manuscript.  Tripp recovers this from the publisher and becomes engrossed in it in the lift and Walter has to take him out.  Walter, Calleigh and Natalia take it apart to analyze for clues.

The story is identical to real life events but there's no ending.  The DB in the book had a puncture mark between her toes where the blood was removed.  Ryan checks the satellite of the island and finds another structure there.  As he and Walter head to check it out, they find a Phantom Rolls Royce which turns out to be the original CS.  Joseph's phone is used to find Marilyn and she tells them the Epilogue will reveal the ending, but it's only available on the audio version.  This leads to a part about a goblet and drinking blood as wine.  Thus leading to the wine collection, only the bottles contain Andrea's blood.  One of them has Kingman's fingerprint.  He claims he was the real writer and she stole his work without giving him credit for it.  He gave her a chance to admit it but she wouldn't, so he drained her of her blood.  Horatio adds he left some behind.

That leaves the unsolved question of the hemlock and so it had to have gotten into her body through her skin.  Calleigh finds some in a perfume bottle from Milan and who has just come from there, Marilyn.  She knew of the blackmail and knew she would continue asking for more money.  The irony came at the end when both the killers pass each other by when arrested and Marilyn doesn't even know he wrote the books for her!  Some would call that poetic justice since he still didn't get his recognition after all that.  Marilyn also says she can write about books in prison and has ridden with police before as part of her research.  So?

Calleigh saying she hates Hallowe'en again.  Clearly this was CSI:Miami's Hallowe'en ep.  Calleigh letting herself get bitten and no one mentions it.  She kept that to herself.  Hey didn't she want to get checked out.  Ryan and his "never forget the smell of dead mice" cos he had a rat trap by the fridge when he was in college. Some more insight into his character though it came a little late in the proceedings as far as the show was concerned.  Walter calling ME Tom : "butter fingers" when he drops the board.  Yeah he can be that and do his job, ha.  Some great laughs even if the storyline wasn't up to par.

Diane Farr playing another killer of late, she was also one in last season's Mentalist.

Tripp becoming a fan of vampire books.  But why was Kingman so stupid enough to base the killings on a MSS (manuscript) that was yet to be published.  How could the so called 'crazed fan' he was hoping to pin the murder on, have known about the story?!  Only in CSI:Miami, where the criminals are dumb and or give themselves away!  Was the Crumbaugh name meant to be a Bart Simpson in-joke?  Aye crumba. Ha.

I still love the Sanguine Love ep of CSI:NY, written by Carmine Giovinazzo (Danny).  One of my fave vampire eps ever and so is Carmine.  Not a vampire of course! But excellent writer and actor.

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